I Double Dare Your Creator, begin right now leaving off the post script to your NO. Can you do it?
It feels really weird at first, simply because we are programmed to defend, explain, update, account for, give a reason for, justify, give an excuse for, vindicate, legitimize…. blah, blah, blah. And it’s all in a effort to placate the Asker while circumventing how we really feel.
When I first began hearing Abraham talk about this, I was a bit frustrated with our non-physical teachers. “Really Abe? How the hell do you just say NO and leave it at that? ”
After a lifetime of my book-ending this smallest of words, uttering the word NO alone felt like half a word, half an answer, naked, missing a limb; like it’s hanging out in space dangling by a thread, begging to be saved by an excuse (usually fabricated!!!).
Well I’ll tell you, its just like anything you want to get good at, you just “damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead” and do it. And you’ll find, as with everything you practice, it gets easier and easier. Soon the mirth you will have when the petitioner hears your lovely NO and gets that look of, “Did she just say that?” will carry you through any embarrassment you might initially have of standing in your power.
I started this NO routine when my daughter was still in elementary school. The other moms are geniuses at coercing you into taking on a project you loathe for “the good of the school, the good of the kids, the good of what-the-heck ever.” So I thought, if I can say NO to these woman, I can hold my own with anyone.
Here was my strategy, say it with a smile, NO 🙂 and add pleasantries as a post script – “No, Thank You.” And then, before my tongue could issue any more words, I’d shut my mouth, still smiling and walk away. That way I couldn’t see their incredulity over the nerve of me!!!
And now? We’ll I’ve gotten so good, so at ease, so aligned at issuing my NO response, that I actually stay to watch their reaction. Through practice I’ve become an adept at flowering up my NO by adding some lovely words (truthful and heartfelt) while making it more fun for me.
“No thank you. But I want to say how much I appreciate woman like you who give of themselves so freely”
Because you know what? I do appreciate them, big time. They’re doing they’re thing, and I mine.
So next time someone asks, “Hey Constance, could you make 100 fucking (my add) cupcakes for the class bake sale?” My answer, “No thank you, but I can’t wait to taste yours. Everybody says they’re the best around.”
Yes Creator, flattery will get you everywhere~*